So why is it that some people are living fabulous, happy lives while I'm wallowing in the sludge that is my worst year EVER. Shoot...worst 5 months EVER. Others can be happy as long as I get a little, too. Easter blew...grief hit big time and I ended up not going to church, not going to lunch, not doing anything. And then my backup job idea...the one I was finally thinking about taking so I can get out of my current one...isn't open anymore!!! For MONTHS they emailed me and I put it off and put it off and here we go: life is crappy. Crappy crappy crappy.

My family (what's left of it) has gone back to their usual weird ways but didn't screw me over this time; they screwed my brother. I'm tired of people lying. If you're gonna promise something, deliver or shut the heck up. I have to go back to work tomorrow; not totally devastating but not high on my happy list, either. I am so sick of everything. What in the world is there to look forward to anymore??? Blah.